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Big Bob

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A beautiful blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help me.

I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get started.

Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"

The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a Rooster."

Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle.

She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.

He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box,

then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to

assemble these pieces into anything resembling a Rooster."

He takes her hand and says, "Secondly, I want you to relax.

Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then.....", he said with a deep sigh,

"Let's put all these Corn Flakes back in the box

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While we're on the topic of jokes..

Mark, a loving husband, was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary and his wife was really ticked off at him.

She told him, "Tomorrow morning I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in under 6 seconds, AND IT BETTER BE THERE."

The next morning Mark got up really early before work. When his wife woke up a couple of hours later, she looked out the window. And sure enough, there was a small gift-wrapped box sitting in the middle of the driveway.

Confused the wife put on her robe, ran out to the driveway and took the box into the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.

Mark is not yet well enough to have visitors.

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