Sharky Posted July 19, 2006 Share Posted July 19, 2006 This Kid will go far… This is an actual job application that a 17-year-old boy submitted at a McDonald’s restaurant in Florida; and they hired him because he was so honest and funny! NAME: Greg Bulmash. SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person. DESIRED POSITION: Company’s President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever’s available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn’t be applying here in the first place. DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that’s not possible, make an offer and we can haggle. EDUCATION: Yes. LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility. SALARY: Less than I’m worth. MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and ‘post-it’ notes. REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked. AVAILABLE FOR WORK: Of course. That’s why I’m applying. PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30 – 3:30pm., Monday, Tuesday and Thursday. DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they’re better suited to a more intimate environment. MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here? DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UPTO 50lbs?: 50lbs. of what? DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the appropriate question here would be “Do you have a car that runs?” HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be the winner of the Publishers Clearinghouse Sweepstakes. DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job, no, on my breaks, yes. WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb blond supermodel who thinks I’m the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I’d like to be doing that now. DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Yes. Absolutely. SIGN HERE: Aries. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flattieman Posted July 19, 2006 Share Posted July 19, 2006 I can understand why they hired him. Flattieman. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Dont Shoot Da Chinamen Posted July 19, 2006 Share Posted July 19, 2006 if i was in management i would 2 but... my management is trying to kick my ass left, right and centre Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nathan74 Posted July 19, 2006 Share Posted July 19, 2006 Thats GOLD !! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
netic Posted July 19, 2006 Share Posted July 19, 2006 great apllication, i think any boss would hire him Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geoff Posted July 20, 2006 Share Posted July 20, 2006 Geoff Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hooked Posted July 20, 2006 Share Posted July 20, 2006 LOVE IT Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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