Fab1 Posted September 10, 2017 Share Posted September 10, 2017 I need advice! I have suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me. You know, just the usual signs: The phone rings and when I answer, the caller hangs up. Plus, she goes out with the girls a lot. I usually try to stay awake to look out for her when she comes home, but I always fall asleep. Anyway, last night about midnight, I woke up and she was not home. So, I hid in the garage, behind my boat and waited for her. When she came home, she got out of someone's car, buttoning her blouse. Then she took her panties out of her purse and slipped them on. It was at that moment, while crouching behind my boat, that I noticed a hairline crack in the outboard motor mounting bracket. Is that something I can weld, or do I need to replace the whole bracket??? Plz any help would be appreciated i plan to go fishing this weekend!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yowie Posted September 10, 2017 Share Posted September 10, 2017 Probably weld it, then drink alcohol (Penfolds Grange would be good, nobody ever was in trouble with that wine before ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rickmarlin62 Posted September 10, 2017 Share Posted September 10, 2017 make her pay for the welding cause its her fault its broken...some females are so unthoughtful Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sigma Posted September 10, 2017 Share Posted September 10, 2017 Plug the crack with her panties....saves you money on the welding. Just don't tell her where the panties ended up, otherwise she will Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sam bros Posted September 10, 2017 Share Posted September 10, 2017 4 hours ago, Fab1 said: I need advice! I have suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me. You know, just the usual signs: The phone rings and when I answer, the caller hangs up. Plus, she goes out with the girls a lot. I usually try to stay awake to look out for her when she comes home, but I always fall asleep. Anyway, last night about midnight, I woke up and she was not home. So, I hid in the garage, behind my boat and waited for her. When she came home, she got out of someone's car, buttoning her blouse. Then she took her panties out of her purse and slipped them on. It was at that moment, while crouching behind my boat, that I noticed a hairline crack in the outboard motor mounting bracket. Is that something I can weld, or do I need to replace the whole bracket??? Plz any help would be appreciated i plan to go fishing this weekend!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JonD Posted September 10, 2017 Share Posted September 10, 2017 Sounds like she's been planning to split everything down the middle!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flickn Mad Posted September 10, 2017 Share Posted September 10, 2017 Mate, that's devastating news! I recon you will have to accept the inevitable and end the relationship, I would go with an ETECK or similar next time. Very reliable. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
big Neil Posted September 10, 2017 Share Posted September 10, 2017 Just what we need on a Monday morning, a wise guy. Good one Fabian. Got any more? BN Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nutsaboutfishing Posted September 10, 2017 Share Posted September 10, 2017 Obviously she isn't a Fishraider or I doubt you would have been brave enough to post the joke. GREAT joke BTW Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fab1 Posted September 10, 2017 Author Share Posted September 10, 2017 2 hours ago, big Neil said: Just what we need on a Monday morning, a wise guy. Good one Fabian. Got any more? BN Keep this in mind come voting time. While walking down the street one day a Federal Politician is tragically hit by a truck and dies. His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance. "Welcome to heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we're not sure what to do with you." "No problem, just let me in," says the man. "Well, I'd like to but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose were to spend eternity." "Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the politician. "I'm sorry but we have our rules." And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a club and standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him. Everyone is very happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him, shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at expense of the people. They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster, caviar and champagne. Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who has a good time dancing and telling jokes. They are having such a good time that, before he realizes it, it is time to go. Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator rises. The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on heaven where St. Peter is waiting for him. "Now it's time to visit heaven." So, 24 hours pass with the head of state joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns. "Well then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your eternity." The politician reflects for a minute, then the senator answers: "Well, I would never have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in hell." So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. Now the door of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage. He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags. The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulder. "I don't understand," stammers the politician. "Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and club, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now all there is a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?" The devil looks at him, smiles and says, "Yesterday we were campaigning...... Today you voted 1 hour ago, nutsaboutfishing said: Obviously she isn't a Fishraider or I doubt you would have been brave enough to post the joke. GREAT joke BTW You new to grow a backbone and stand up for yourself mate.Tell the mrs that you are the boss,do as I say,Speak when asked like I do.Then quietly retreat to the bedroom,grab some clothes and a pillow and get comfortable outside with the dog for a little while.lol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrsswordfisherman Posted September 11, 2017 Share Posted September 11, 2017 4 hours ago, nutsaboutfishing said: Obviously she isn't a Fishraider or I doubt you would have been brave enough to post the joke. GREAT joke BTW It's OK I will contact her and sign her up heh heh Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DerekD Posted September 11, 2017 Share Posted September 11, 2017 (edited) Fab1, I feel your pain. It must hurt deeply to know your beloved is now damaged goods. Even taking the time to fix what is now a blatantly obvious problem in your life might not be worth it as it won't be the same beauty you fell in love with. You will always be wondering if you had done something different would you now have this problem. Once you resolve the situation will you do things differently in the future. Have you learned anything?? All that wondering will start to distract you at work. You'll be talking to your mates about it when you probably should be dealing with the issue directly. Their conflicting advice will leave you even more confused. You will likely lose focus and direction in your life. I think you need to have some more time fishing to help you get things back in perspective at which time you should be able to make a well balanced decision on how to proceed. Ideally take a few mates with you to ensure you don't do anything overly impulsive in a kneejerk reaction during your time of grief. Oh I almost forgot.... You mentioned something about the missus but I skimmed over that part till I got to the important bit.... Edited September 11, 2017 by DerekD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
big Neil Posted September 11, 2017 Share Posted September 11, 2017 Another good one Fabian...it's no wonder we only believe half the lies the politicians tell us, before we vote them in. BN Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fab1 Posted September 11, 2017 Author Share Posted September 11, 2017 7 minutes ago, big Neil said: Another good one Fabian...it's no wonder we only believe half the lies the politicians tell us, before we vote them in. BN I think we just get feed up with all their lies and then toss a coin to decide which parties lies sound the best. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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