OWZAT

G`day Fellas , Robbie , Its Xmas hols , and unfortunately we all have to suffer these fools . These weekend warriors who have no respect for anybody or anything , honestly believe the entite Universe was created just for their own personal Use. We had an Ultralight here yesterday Skimming the Sand Dunes at Low Level , which is not only dangerous , but scares the beejeezuz out of the "Little Terns" who are nesting and egg sitting , and when scared off , the eggs spoil in the sun and of course they don`t hatch . Not to mention raising the Hackles of the " Fist Shaking - Goon Waders" chucking Plastics for Flatties . I suppose all we can do is grin and bear it , although Slashing a few Tyres would ease our pain slightly though. Mick PS , The Link Below is a very Usel site for Converting anything to Anything !!. http://www.onlineconversion.com/speed_all.htm

G`day Fellas , Mondsie , I had a Great Xmas Mate , and I too , am looking forward to improved Fishing conditions . It seems pretty well widespread though as far as I can tell, not many good reports comming in from all over that I can see. If this Keeps up , I`ll have no excuse not to do my housework , so c`mon you flatties... C`mon........ Best Wishes to all members and their Families . Mick

G`day Fellas , Well Myself and Lawrie hit the Lagoon for a flick this morning , and finished up with one keeper. The Place was rather Busy , and there were 4x4 everywhere , but even with the aid of the 4X4`s even the locals were lucking out. One flip in an Ultra light air Craft was dune hopping at a dangerously low level , and incured the Wrath of the Rangers . He probably won`t know it till he gets home , but his antics will cost him dearly . Mick

G`day Fellas , 1. aaaarrghhhhhh 2. Field Of Dreams 5. Monty Python ....and the ...Holy Grail Mick

UNCLE Every year about now, my mind wanders back to my “late” Uncle. Uncle, a shakehahahaha quoting thespian, spoke 4 languages, had a couple of degrees, for what I can`t remember, and who`s many talents included a photographic memory, but alas, he was also an alchoholic! This wonderful gentle man, had 3 consuming passions, the Ist was cricket, 2nd the “Arts”, and 3rd was fishing, (I did not include the obvious). On many occaisions after lecturing at Uni, he would slip down to Circular Quay, and fish for just about anything, but he was a wizard at catching Leather Jackets on strips of tripe of all things. On the occasions when he was “dry”, my mother would allow me to accompany him to the Quay, where we would catch many a slimey mackarel, and of course Leather Jackets. NO 6 wharf, which was near the water police from memory, and I think is now the overseas terminal, was also a terrific spot for reasonable sized jewies, as well as small snapper, bream, trumpeter, and in season, tailor used to give you some hurry up as well. But when a schoal of mackka`s hit the scene, absolute pandomonium broke out, and chaos ruled. There would be as many as 20 people fishing that wharf,and and with multiple hookups,came multiple tangles as well, I can still hear the excited cries of “watch it mate”, “look out, I`m over you”,as if it were yesterday,at ten years of age,these were precious memories I still cherish to this day,along with the many weekends and Xmas holidays I spent with my dad. My fondest memory of Uncle was,on a lovely warm Summer Sunday afternoon in December about 5pm,and as customary,Uncle would treat me to a hamburger and a milk shake,but on this particular day,he had been disapearing regularly,and of course,he had been tippling at his “stash”. So,as we were watching some other people fishing for yellowtail and eating our hamburgers,the Salvation Army band positioned itself directly behind us. Now uncle,among his many talents,had also been a chorus line Tapper at the old Tivoli Theatre during the depression,and was gifted with a beautiful tenors voice to boot!. I shall never forget that scene as long as I live,Uncle obviously slightly under the influence, his cap respectfully removed, clasped in both hands in a typical choir boys pose, his head raised to the heavens,joined the Salvo`s in a stiring rendition of a favourite xmas carol. Passers by soon gathered, as they did in those days, and also as was the practice in those days, Myself,as well as the rest of the gathering,were joined,as one, in song. Ironically,it would be the Salvo`s who would “dry him out”, save his life, only for him to die from a misdiagnosed heart attack, after being sober for 10 or more years. So fellas,I`m always the 1st to “hit my kick” when the Salvos come calling,for there is no more deserving charity in the world in my opinion. Now,as we all now come together for another Xmas with our familys and friends,I would love to think that perhaps something I will do, at this special time, will stay in the hearts and minds of others for ever as well, “Eh Fellas”. Let me take this opportunity to wish all members,with no exclusions a Happy and Merry xmas. May every wish you make be granted, and any journey you take, be a “safe” one!. Mick

G`day Fellas , Believe It Or Not , A Mate Of Mine used to turn green the minute he smelt the Saltwater. Years of experiments went by , untill one day he was given a Ponstan Tablet , and to this day has never been sick since . Ponstan are used by The Ladies For Period Pain. I fortunately , am one of the Lucky ones , who never gets crook no matter how bad it gets. I was told seasickness has something to do with the Middle Ear , but dunno wether or not it was true. Mick

G`day Fellas, Yeah mate , it won and paid 4.30 , which rounded of the year Ok . I think we finished up all winning about 450 each for the year , which almost doubled our outlay for 2006 . Though we left 100 in the Bank to Back Roman Arch in the Perth cup on 1/1/2007 , probably 50 each way , but Fixed Odds at the moment has him at 17/1 and the Boss reckons that is Unders , so we will wait and see. Just ordered My xmas pressie , A New 3 gig AMD Dual Core chip and Board , and all I gotta do Now is decide how much Ram and what sort of Box to Put it in. Bring on ADSL 2 . Mick

G`day Fellas , Just Chatting to one of the Locals, and he was telling me , that one day last week , he went for his dawn stroll along the Beach , and came upon a pile of Jewie Scales larger than a 50 cent piece . There was also a drag mark along the sand , as wide as a Millet Broom. Now I gotta tell ya , It was not one of the regulars here , because if it had of been , someone would have blabbed by now. Mick

G`day Fellas , Our Last Bet for 2006 . MELB RACE 3. BOX TRIFECTA......... $1.00 Unit 1356 BOX..... Is`t..4......$1.00 Unit 1356 If any ....$100.00...Win....Race 7.... No 2 ..Ulysses We also backed a Strong Stable tip yesterday in The Ist Race in Melb , which of course must remain secret. Good Luck whatever you are backing . Mick

Ok Fellas , Have a crack at this one !!, Ipinched it from another Site . How Smart Is Your Right Foot ? This is so funny that it will boggle your mind. And, you will keep trying it at least 50 more times to see if you can outsmart your foot. But you can't!!! 1. While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles with it. 2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand.. Your foot will change direction!!! Mick

G`day Fellas , Aint it the Case ??. Mick

G`day Fellas , Well , Arthurs Cheques have finally Arrived , but will now take another 2/3 weeks to clear , and he also faces a conversion charge of about $90.00 . Mick

An American decided to write a book about famous churches around the world. So he bought a plane ticket and took a trip to Orlando, thinking that he would start by working his way across the USA from South to North. On his first day he was inside a church taking photographs when he noticed golden telephone mounted on the wall with a sign that read "$10,000 per call". The American, being intrigued, asked a priest who was strolling by what the telephone was used for. The priest replied that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 you could talk to God. The American thanked the priest and went along his way. Next stop was in Atlanta. There, at a very large cathedral, he saw the same golden telephone with the same sign under it. He wondered if this was the same kind of telephone he saw in Orlando and he asked a nearby nun what its purpose was. She told him that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 he could talk to God. "O.K., thank you," said the American. He then travelled to Indianapolis, Washington DC, Philadelphia, Boston,and New York. In every church he saw the same golden telephone with the same $10,000 per call" sign under it. The American, upon leaving Vermont decided to travel to AUSTRALIA to see if Australians had the same phone. He arrived in Australia, and again, in the first church he entered, there was the same golden telephone, but this time the sign under it read "40 cents per call." The American was surprised so he asked the priest about the sign. Father, I've travelled all over America and I've seen this same golden telephone in many churches. I'm told that it is a direct line to Heaven,but in the US the price was $10,000 per call. Why is it so cheap here?" The priest smiled and answered, "You're in Australia now, son - it's a local call". Mick

G`day Fellas , I think most of you just like me , will be astounded to know that the image below is in OZ not europe , and in fact not far from where I Live . Lozza when after reading this , might like to fill us in on how it came about !. Or perhaps hookie will know ???. Mick

G`day Fellas Todays Roughies as usual are In Melbourne. Parlay Place $4.00 Place Race......5...NO.....5.....ROYAL LAKES Race......6...NO.....8.....ESCEEGEE Race..... 7...NO.....8.....GOVENOR BOIS Race......8...NO.....8.....BOTTLE DAME GOOD LUCK WITH WHATEVER YOU ARE ON. MICK

G`day Fellas Anybody wanna buy a rather Crumpled , Frayed , and much the worse for wear , Black BooK ???. Mick

G`day Fellas , Looks Like the Carcass Of A Baby Dolphin to me. Probably got foul hooked in the gut ,and pulled clear . Mick

G`day Fellas , A woman stopped by unannounced at her recently married son's house. She rang the doorbell and walked in. She was shocked to see her daughter-in-law lying on the couch, totally naked. Soft music was playing, and the aroma of perfume filled the room. "What are you doing?" she asked. "I'm waiting for my husband to come home from work," the daughter-in-law answered. "But you're naked!" the mother-in-law exclaimed." This is my love dress," the daughter-in-law explained. "Love dress? But you're naked!" "My husband loves me to wear this dress," she explained. "It excites him to no end. Every time he sees me in this dress, he instantly becomes romantic and ravages me for hours on end. He can't get enough of me." The mother-in-law left. When she got home, she undressed, showered, put on her best perfume, dimmed the lights, put on a romantic CD, and laid on the couch waiting for her husband to arrive. Finally her husband came home. He walked in and saw her laying there so provocatively. "What are you doing?" he asked. "This is my love dress," she whispered, sensually. .................... ................. "Needs ironing," he said. "What's for dinner?" Mick

G`day fellas , Ok I fess up , Thats exactly what we thought it was , and also why we wuz having such giggling fits . Mick

G`day Fellas , Martin , last... 2.... nights ........6 hours ........zilch !!!!. Mick

G`day Fellas , I was just about to wave a visitor goodbye , when when the lady in the unit next to mine , approached us in a highly exagerated state , and asked us to see if we could Identify a noise comming from her car after the ignition was switched off. Well , as you probably know By now , I `am never one to Leave a Damsel In distress , so both Myself and My Visitor Arthur went to take a look. Sure enough , the Ignition was switched off , and all knobs were in the"Off " position for The Aircon etc, etc. Now this whirring noise , seemed to be comming from the Back of the veichle , so we lifted the Boot and checked all around in the copartments , but the whirring noise still persisited , bugga , What The ? . Even with the Boot lid open , we could still hear the noise , and it was definately comming from the Inside of the car. Both Arthur and I eased our way into the veichle , and listened as best we could , when Lo and Behold , we noticed a beach bag on the Back seat. Lifting the bag up closer to our ears , We Heard our diminishing Mystery noise comming from the depths of the bag. " Its definately comming from this bag," said Arthur holding it up by the straps . My neighbour immediately grabbed the bag from arthurs hands and began frantically searching through its contents. Now , By this time Arthur and I were looking at each other in that all knowing Male Chauvanistic type of Way , desperately trying to stifle our sniggering , when Bingo , out popped The offending Noisemaker . A Bloody electric Toothbrush ! , well , bugger me , I would have bet $100.oo to a 5 cent piece it would have been an electric Screw driver . They Say laughter is extremely benifical to the aged , well after today , we sure as hell got a few years back , coz I`ve still got the giggles. Mick

G`day Fellas, We normaly thread a long fat worm all the way up the line for about a foot , then loop another one or two around the bend in the hook threading it through here and there , then going through the head so the whole lot does not slip off . Just depends on the quality of The worms caught . I use the straight through Method with a Ball sinker about 4 feet from the hook , others use the Paternoster Rig , and you know fishing , one night one rig prevails , next night the other rig or even the baits win out. One night here , we were using live worms and got Zilch , two guys using Salmon and Blackfish fillets killed em Mick

G`day Fellas , Domza , 13 People Fishing along here last Night .....2 people Caught Jews Using worms ....the Others as far as I know , struck out. Mick

G`day Fellas , A group Pic of the catch , and the Boys will need some advice on Using digi cameras after this effort. 30 odd photos taken , and most were out of frame . Mick

G`day fellas , Owzat Jnr , and Fishing Buddy Mick Morely , fished Old Bar Beach Last Night For 5 Good jews all around the 20 LB mark. Mick